I can tell you exactly how it happens, because it happened again last week.
The phone rings. Somebody needs something: a committee filled, a shift covered, a fundraiser run, a favor, a hand, an hour. And before they've even finished the ask, I can feel the yes forming. Not in my head. In my chest. Like a reflex. Like a knee the doctor just tapped.
"Sure. Happy to. No problem."
Ask anybody who knows me. I say yes to almost everything. Work. The fire department. The booster club. Every board I'm asked to be on. Every friend that calls. Even church.
And for a long time, I told myself that was just being faithful. Using what God gave me. I called it being generous with my time.
Really, some of it was fear wearing a name tag that said "generous."
Scripture doesn't leave much mystery about what's underneath the compulsive yes, either:
"The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is safe." — Proverbs 29:25
What are your yeses watering?
Some of them are watering the garden — real love, real service, real fruit. God made you a doer? Wonderful. Do.
But if there's a yes in your life that you can't not say... if the thought of somebody's disappointment puts a cold hand on the back of your neck... if you've ever felt less like a person and more like a performance that can never end —
then somewhere, there's a name tag. And it's worth finding out what's printed underneath it.
Mine said "generous."
It was fear.
So, what are you watering this week?
This is an excerpt from my book, What Are You Watering?, coming soon.